My friend, Kristen, was fed up. Her husband’s job was taking him away from home more and more. He was gone Monday through Friday and had even contemplated moving to the city to be closer to work. She was at home, with their 3-year-old twins and most days she was alone. She wanted to be happy, but all that she felt was stress.
She wanted to feel JOY again…
So, she finally talked to her mentor (she and I have a mutual friend that has been married for 36 years and has been through it all. My friend Kristen, talks to Diana quite a bit when she has a big problem.)
Diana’s advice: Wait on it. Give it exactly 6 months and see how you feel. If in a year’s time, he is still traveling so much and you aren’t getting along well, you will know that you have given it your all.
Well, three months later, her husband moved positions within the company and now he not only doesn’t travel as often, but two days a week he gets to work from home.
The thing about marriage is that it is a forever thing. If you think about your problem in the terms of a lifetime, it will feel a whole lot smaller. Allow time to pass. See what happens next and take everything one day at a time.
In my own life, this advice has worked time and time again, because I apply it to all things. Try, for one moment, to think about a very stressful time in your life. Maybe a job change? A breakup? A move? An argument? At the time, it is all-consuming, but it the giant “soup-bowl” of life, it is just a spoonful.
The next time that something stressful comes up in your marriage, try to remember to take it just one day at a time and have patience. That’s the good thing about a marriage- you have the rest of your lives to work on it. 🙂
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