When you’ve been married for any length of time, once you’re out of the ‘honeymoon phase’ it’s all too easy to get comfortable in your marriage. And it’s okay to get comfortable, just don’t get too comfortable. Being too comfortable can turn into laziness, and you don’t want to get lazy!
Here’s what I mean. When we get comfortable, we know what our partner likes. What they don’t like. What they expect. What they need. How to best respond to them.
And while that’s so important, don’t let your actions and reactions become so automatic that you don’t really put any thought into them at all.
Marriage takes work, continuously. When you get too comfortable, you become lazy about doing the work and trying to make your relationship the best it can be. When that happens, I’m afraid you’re setting yourself up for hard times. And we don’t want to see that happen now, do we?
So to be sure you’re not getting lazy and not too comfortable in your relationship, here are a few tips I hope will help.
Try Something New on Date Night
Maybe you’ve been good about sticking to your date nights, but they’ve become a bit predictable. It’s the same old thing, dinner at the same restaurant, a movie, or whatever your go-to date night plans are.
Try spicing it up a bit and doing something totally different…a new adventure! Go roller skating, to an art gallery, bike riding, wine tasting. There are a huge number of options, the point is, do something different! You never know when you’ll find something new that you both really enjoy. It will give you another alternative to add to your date night regular events.
Look for Ways to Help Everyday
You probably have set things you take care of at your house. From cooking, to household chores, to finances, to the kids, for most couples, things are split so that you’re each taking care of certain tasks. But that doesn’t mean you can’t also help one another.
Maybe your spouse has had a bad day, and needs a little break from everything. Take over duties for the evening. Or maybe just joining in and helping with a task or two will lighten their load while making them feel like you really care.
Express Your Feelings Often- Including Compliments!
I know, your husband knows how you feel about him so you shouldn’t have to say it, right?
Wrong!
Just because he knows doesn’t mean he doesn’t need to hear it. The same goes with compliments. When is the last time you told your husband how much you appreciate something he does (going to work, taking care of the kids, etc.) or that he looks exceptionally handsome before you go out?
The little things that you don’t think mean much sometimes turn out to be big things. It’s not like you have to run around gushing over each other all day, but letting too many days go by without kind words of affection, appreciation or compliments can leave a partner feeling unappreciated, undervalued, and even unloved.
I hope you can use the tips above to make sure you don’t get too comfortable in your marriage. Let’s keep it full of life, shall we? We’d love to hear your thoughts, how do you keep from getting too comfortable in your marriage?
Kimi
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